As a Personal Trainer I often work with a ton of people who are always trying to unlock the key to happiness, and their dream body. One lesson I learned was this; the number on the scale doesn’t really matter. What really matters is the relationship a person has with his or her own self-image and body, not mathematics.

Do not get me wrong; if you step on the scale and it says 300lbs, you have a good parameter and measurement of where you are and what you need to do!

But that’s all that it is, simply a measurement tool, one parameter of measurement, and one single number. And like I talk about in so many of my blog posts, the mind latches on to numbers because it loves to analyze.

This behavior in-itself leads to pathologies and negative identifications. I cannot tell you how many women I trained that came in to me looking flabby and weak, or skinny-fat, as I like to say.

Someone who is skinny-fat you would not typically think of as being overweight, but to a trained professional it is easy to see that they are just as unhealthy as someone who is overweight, and that they just express it differently.

Anyways, I would train women like this week-in and week-out, and they would have some drastic transformations and great results.

There legs were toned and they actually had great thighs and a shapely bottom, where before they were flat as a pancake and flabby. Their cores were much more functional and coordination had improved greatly. They constantly came in exclaiming just how much better they felt and how their energy had improved.

 But then they would get on the scale and it all went out the window, at least in their heads.

 They only lost 2lbs! All that hard work, only to lose a mere 2lbs. They wanted to come into it and lose at least 10! Isn’t that what happens when you work out? You beat the crap out of yourself, the weight flies off, and now you are sexy and happy.

The problem was that these women did not understand that the number on the scale is not important; it is about how you look and feel.

These women were people who CONVERTED a ton of unhealthy fat into MUSCLE! Their metabolism had improved and they had developed more lean mass and metabolically active tissue, and they replaced bad fat with healthier fat stores from an improved diet.

They looked leaner, felt better, and were happier!

But they let a number ruin it, their expectations would end up taking much of the good away from them. I would always tell them, the scale may only say 2lbs. but in reality the changes in your metabolism and lean mass could be like 15lbs. you just cannot see it in the number on the scale.

Unfortunately not everyone took my advice to heart, and after feeling discouraged they would give up on training or working out as hard, their diets would revert back to processed crap food once their motivation waned, and they were back to square one.

I’ve seen it time and time again.

Client comes in with crazy expectations as to what they think their weight loss should be, they already have a pre-defined number.

Client trains hard for 6 weeks, develops strength, coordination, core, loses a few lbs., and builds a ton of muscle.

They look great and feel great, they are performing much better.

Then they get on the scale… and in one swift second they think that they made no progress because they do not realize that the number doesn’t matter.

 Even if you are 500lbs the number on the scale does not matter.

 The human mind can be our most powerful enemy in overcoming our unhealthy habits and identification with weight issues.   The scale is there for a reason, but do not make it something more than what it really is.

Your weight is a number, nothing more.

The most important aspect of losing weight is how you FEEL. It is about your natural energy levels, the glow of your skin, the way your clothes fit. How functional and in-shape are you? Can you perform any daily activities, including recreational pursuits, without any pain or need of further conditioning?

I am not here to help anyone rationalize ignoring his or her health; I am just suggesting a different mindset when it comes to losing weight.

If all of those people I trained had focused on how they FELT, and even looked in some cases, they probably would have had a second burst of motivation and reward to continue on their journey of internal AND external health.

They did not go within for their motivation and drive. Instead they focused on one number: their weight.

Had they decided to reward themselves for looking better, being more toned, feeling amazing, and committing to training, they would have realized that they looked GREAT and made a TON of progress.

Instead they brainwashed themselves that they did not make any, and the second they hit that plateau they just gave up.

I wondered what many of them would have turned out like if they had simply put their energy into what they HAD accomplished, and the fact that they LOOKED great. They probably would have continued learning about eating healthy and finding new ways to be active and happy. All of which would have eventually contributed to even more fat-loss and balanced holistic health.

 The extremes of weight loss and health end up confusing a lot of people and misguiding them.

 We see shows like The Biggest Loser, diet pills, insane workouts, tabloids, plastic surgery, health claims, the new super-food that cures all, the best way to workout.

The truth is that it is all bullshit.

The only truths are:

•  You need to be active.
•  You need to limit your stress.
•  You need to follow your dream.
•  You need to connect with others and be happy.
•  You need to eat organic and whole foods, and balance your healthy fats.
•  You need to limit your time sedentary in front of the TV or sitting.
•  And you always need to be learning and growing.
•  You do not need to beat the crap out of yourself until you die physically; this is not how you lose weight. You do not get a 6-pack by doing 10,000 crunches (you probably just get back-pain if you do that).

Most people are already stressed to the max with their jobs and lifestyles. They drink too much coffee, hate their jobs, and then put even more pressure on themselves over a number.

Then they go and try to change that number with all of their energy for a few weeks and get unmotivated again when no REAL change has taken place. They did nothing to change their attitude, mindset, or limit their stress.

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 Always look to the root of the problem, not a symptom or measurement. The number on the scale doesn’t matter because that is just DATA, not the source of the data itself.

 I talk to clients all the time who are aware their stress is causing them to eat crappy at night, oftentimes they are addicted to processed sugar. Then they whine about how the weight does not come off and make me feel like I am not doing my job, in reality, a trainer can only do so much.

You can teach someone to be disciplined, you can teach them to eat better, you can teach them how to workout perfectly. You can basically teach them all of the tools how to be healthy and happy.

But you cannot create LASTING change if their mindset and attitude is wrong from the get-go.

This is why it so important to do some psychological work on yourself if you REALLY want to sculpt a new body. And be realistic. You need to have a dream and a vision of your new healthy self.

And remember, the number does not matter.

I’ve worked with people who lost 80lbs. and are still miserable. They still complain. And you know what the funny part is?

Their body is muscular, toned, and they are rail-thin, but they STILL have a “magic” number they need to hit. That’s when they will finally be happy.

 You need to go within to find true happiness, if you cannot be happy now you won’t be happy tomorrow.

 Find a place within yourself, your deepest source of inspiration and love.

Recall a hobby that you may have neglected a long time ago, something that filled you with joy.

If you need help here are some things that I love to do:

•  Walking/Hiking
• Petting my animals.
• Connecting with family and friends.
• Eating healthy cooked meals.
• Shopping for organic food.
• Writing.
• Napping.
• Yoga.
• Painting.
• Singing.
• Dancing.
• Training people.
• Working on my blog.

I say “hobby” but what I am really referencing is something that you have passion and love for. Unfortunately most of us do not have this in our work lives, but if you are lucky enough to have a job you love, focus on your work.

Find your passion, person, or purpose, so that you can tap into them for love and support when you need to be reminded of the path you want to be on, and who you truly are. This will be the MOST important thing you should do before you start your journey to losing weight and getting in-shape.

Get back in touch with YOURSELF. This is where happiness and health grows from. Think of your innate ability to love, heal yourself, and have passion, as the roots that your newfound health and body will grow from.

Without the foundation and a strong root system, you can change the outward appearance temporarily, but it will not create lasting change.

 Before you begin changing yourself on the outside, you MUST go within.

 I would highly recommend a practice like Yoga that focuses on the breath and an inward focus on the body. Supplementing your training routine or workday with Yoga has numerous health, anti-aging, and de-stressing benefits.

Another great tool is to simply walk each and every day. Walking is incredibly low-impact, meditative, and will help you shed the weight. Walking is a weight-bearing exercise (meaning you are supporting your entire bodyweight yourself, unlike cycling for example). This means more fat will be burned and your lean mass will improve from the steady-state endurance cardio that walking can provide. It means better posture, better breathing, a chance to get outside, and stronger bones.

Manage your stress and emotional well-being. Find people who support and love you and stay away from negative people who want to keep viewing you as unhealthy.

Remember that other people project the “you” that you have been for years; some people may not want you to change. This is why it is imperative to go within and have fortitude and passion that cannot be touched.

When things get tough, or you eat shitty, gain a few lbs. back, or miss some workouts; the inner force and passion within will call to you and reach out again.

It has always worked this way for me. Remember, there is never an instant in life where you, anyone, or myself, is perfectly balanced. It is always a flow and rhythm of adjustments and change. That is what being human is all about.

 So stop identifying with data, because at the end of the day the number on the scale doesn’t really matter. You need to go within, find your dream and passion, and what makes you truly happy.

 Once you can find your dream and passion, and focus on how you FEEL, not a number, you will naturally begin to make the necessary changes.

Be mindful of the things in life that are important to you, let them stem from your passion.

– You will find that toxic and processed foods make you feel sluggish and brain-fogged, they limit your ability to fulfill your dreams and goals, so you stop eating processed foods and buy organic.

– You realize that sitting all day is ruining your back, so you limit your sedentary time and begin walking 1 hour each and every day.

 – You realize you want to be toned and in insane shape for sports, so you’ll lookup workout routines online or hire a trainer.

 – You’ll see that your clothes are fitting better and your energy is higher when you begin exercising, but your diet is still a little dirty. Then you can clean up your diet and let your lifestyle changes begin feeding off of one another.

All of these are examples of positive changes that stem from being in touch with YOUR BODY. By simply being connected to our body and listening to what it is saying we do not need to worry about the number on the scale.

So please, browse the site and keep learning about ways to manage your stress, find your dream, build strong relationships, and truly be happy.  Don’t focus on a number anymore, which is just data, and don’t go trying to slam that number down, it won’t last.

Focus on YOUR happiness, your energy levels, and the things you love. THEN begin making the health changes you need such as trying a diet or exercise routine. The weight will naturally come off on it’s own if you follow this approach, because the weight-loss is just a side effect of true health and happiness. Remember to go within first, once you can find peace in the present moment everything else will fall into place.

To healthy, balanced, and sustainable weight loss.